By Nicholeen Peck Recently, I came across a quote that said that the “spiritual solidarity of the family” would determine the success of many things, such as churches and societies. This inspired a lot of thought. We all know the family’s role in society is crucial. In fact, the whole of society pivots around the family. We know that if the family isn’t pivotal and valued the society decays. Could spiritual solidarity be the answer? What is spiritual? In Webster’s 1828 Dictionary spiritual is defined as “consisting of spirit; refined from external things; not sensual; holy” So, according to this definition, a spiritual family would focus on keeping the spirit of love, of unity, of God with them at all times. Their hearts would be knit together in love, which is a spiritual expression. They would know what this feeling felt like and would deliberately invite this spirit into their communications and relationships. This definition also makes it clear that a spiritual person is not the same as a worldly person. They have been refined. The spiritual person, or family, would focus more on the internal workings of themselves and the family than on the external. As the family focused on inviting the spirit of love into the interior of their relationships and home life they would not give in to the sensual, often selfish, desires and cravings we all experience in life. They would know that the spiritual is more important than the sensual and would choose not to act upon those sensual voices. The process of choosing the spiritual voice over the sensual voice makes a person self-governed and holy. This is the kind of person who learns to listen to the Spirit instead of the cravings of the body is a powerful person indeed. What would happen if each person in a whole family had this kind of self-government; if they understood spirituality and lived spiritually solid? Let’s talk about solidarity. Online solidarity means, “unity or agreement of feeling or action within a group.” For further understanding, I searched in my Webster’s 1828 Dictionary for the word solidarity, but couldn’t find it. Apparently, the word was not used in 1828. But, the root of the word, solid, was in the dictionary. Understanding the word solid helps the word solidarity make much more sense. Solid means, “firm; compact having its constituent particles so close or dense as to resist the impression or penetration of other bodies…parts are not easily movable or displaced.” How Can The Family Change The World? Eureka! The definition of the word solid is a gold mine for societies, governments and the world. Most people don’t like change. In fact, no one is happy when major things in life, like family relationships, change or deteriorate. If the family is solid it cannot be changed by outside sources. When the family is solid it cannot be destroyed, altered or penetrated by distractions or dysfunctions. The unity of the family is powerful, but the spiritual unity of the family is unconquerable. To create a spiritually solid group the family must be united in principles, beliefs, purpose, and practices. To have this kind of unity each family member must know and desire the feeling of the Spirit of love, they must understand and respect the roles of each person in the family, and they must have an effective method of communication, teaching and correction that connects the family instead of divides the family, as is common in modern times. I Don’t Understand If the families in our communities become spiritually solid the damaging messages that cause so much concern to parents now days would have no effect. We live in a time when people are concerned about governments defining and controlling families, agendas forming the minds of our young people in negative ways which are contrary to the happiness of the family, and the roles of family members are being misrepresented and misunderstood. Why do we put up with this treatment of the family? Why are people trying to restructure the family and break it apart? What is to be gained by this? I don’t understand. These are real concerns. People, like me, spend countless days trying to stop the micromanaging and damaging of the family. But, the real power to combat these concerns, the real answer, lies in the family. The family must heal itself. It must become spiritually solid again, as it once was in times of old. Then, we will be happy and impenetrable. What To Do To create spiritual solidarity in the family we need to:
- Be firm in our beliefs. Be religious. Practice our faith each day alone and as a family.
- Strengthen relationships by having regular and frequent family time.
- Decrease distractions to the family
- Have a pre-determined, common vocabulary for basic family communication and correction that the whole family uses. (The most common reason parents are ineffective is because mothers and fathers and children do not have a unified vocabulary for problem solving and respecting roles which leads to communication frustration and isolation.) Common vocabulary will decrease contention and increase unity and respect.
Never in the history of the world has every family believed that the family benefits from spiritual solidarity. There has always been opposition to this idea. But, if we look back through history it is easy to see that the families which were spiritually solid always accomplished more than those who were not. They were also more independent of government involvement, contributed more positively to their societies, and were more attached to family and community than those members of families who were not spiritually solid. What kind of future do you want for your family? Socially influenced mediocrity or spiritual solidarity? If you need help with steps 2, 3, and 4 on the list above go to https://parentingselfgovernment.com/store If you want to see a video illustrating the differences between families who are not spiritually solid and one that is, watch this BBC show.